


oh, all of these minutes passing, sick of feeling used

by orphan_account



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, gyu is sad a lot, idk how to tag okay im sorry, well this is a mess™
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-08 23:54:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11092560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: All Mingyu wanted was to be happy, but how could he be, when he couldn't even accept himself?(or, Wonwoo and Mingyu get far too attached, angst ensues)





	1. i

Mingyu arrived into school with his earphones at full volume - like he always had. He approached his locker and began entering his password when-

“Hey! You’re Kim Minhye’s son, right? I heard you’re new in town.” The taller gave the girl a look up and down, noting her pale legs, her skirt which was definitely too short to fit the school’s restrictions, and her smile which just screamed ‘tryhard’. “I’m Ah-reum. Fitting, right? Anyway, since you’re new here, I was wondering if you wanted me to show you around, if you catch my drift.” She winked and leaned in closer, only to make Mingyu more uncomfortable than he already was.

“How kind.” He deadpanned. But, really, rejecting her would just please his family, help him preserve that blatantly false image of a perfect son they’d always wished for. And the only thing he hated more than tryhards was living for and only for his family. “Why not?”

So, there he was, sat in the boy’s changing room, straddled by some girl he couldn’t really remember the name of, with a messy tongue delving into his throat. It’s not like he felt anything for her, but he felt this rush go down his spine. He planned it perfectly: make sure to take her to a public place where anyone can walk; keep the door wide open, and wait until someone walks in. Simple.

Being caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to meant his family would find out. Mingyu - 1, Family - 0.

His plan worked perfectly, and just in time. As her one of her hands unbuttoned his shirt and the other pushed its way underneath it, Mingyu found himself a little disgusted that he let it get this far. Thankfully, everything suddenly stopped when he heard someone stutter behind him.

“I- Uh…” The boy was clearly in shock, and Mingyu honestly felt sorry for the boy. “He haven’t met, but I’m Chan! I mean- sorry, I- I’ll leave now!” The boy ran away, tripping over his own feet. Poor kid.

As Mingyu stood up, fixed his shirt and tidied himself in general, the girl whined, “Mingyu-oppa!” Said boy cringed. “What are- Will we ever…” Thankfully, Mingyu understood, but found it slightly funny.

“This was nice, but it’s just a one time thing. Sorry, gotta go.”

With that, he left. And to top it all off, he didn’t turn up to his first three lessons.

 

“Okay… Thanks, Mrs. Byun. Yes, I understand.” Mrs Kim sighed, and rubbed a frustrated hand across her face. “I’ll make sure to talk to him about it when he arrives. Thank you.”

Almost on cue, Mingyu unlocked the door and entered his home, although the atmosphere definitely didn’t scream ‘homely’ right now.

“Kim Mingyu, get in here right now.” His mom’s not-shout was the worst. He thought he would have gotten used to it after so many times, but it still manages to chill him to his bones.

He entered the room, and immediately, he wished he hadn’t. She was crying, evidence of tear stains running down her cheek.

“What happened to you?” She was screaming now. “You used to love being with your family, being with me! We’d talk about university and how you wanted to be an actor like your father. But now you sleep with.. with whores! You even skip school, you used to love school! Now, instead… you decide to throw it all away for- for what exactly?”

The one thing Mingyu knew about his mom was to never make her mad. And it looks like he already fucked up, so why not just go all out?

“I grew up, mom! I don’t want to do what dad does! I never have. No one in this family ever fucking listens!” Mingyu participates in this shouting match for another 5 minutes or so, but he realised he really, really fucked up.

Before Mingyu could even get another word in, he felt knuckles drag themselves over his face, and the pain that came with it was indescribable.

“Don’t you dare speak to your mother that way, okay?” Kim Minhye: award-winning actor, most successful model of the 90s, complete _asshole_. When Mingyu didn’t reply, he grabbed the boy’s hair and pulled it, forcing eye contact. “I said, okay?”

Mingyu was defeated, he knew that. “Yes, father.” He spat the last word with such venom that it stung.

“Now, get out of this house.” His father’s words didn’t really come as a shock, but just hearing him say them pushed Mingyu a little too far over. He did as he was told and bolted down his drive, climbing over their far-too-big fence and just kept running until his legs couldn’t carry him anymore.

  
When he finally stopped, he was in an empty alleyway. Great, Mingyu thought. But no matter how much danger he knew he was in, he just couldn’t bring himself to care. Someone could find him right now and bring a fist to his neck, punch him in the ribs until he couldn’t breath, and he wouldn’t find it in himself to care. And that’s just what happened. There was two of them, probably around college age, Mingyu didn't really know. All he knew right now was take a deep breath, deep breaths.

He knew his injuries weren’t fatal, and they would just lead to bruising and aching, so he sat still on the ground, catching his breath. He was going to be okay, just breathe, you’ll be fine. And he was fine. After standing up - with some difficulty - his first goal was get out of this damn alleyway.

 

“Wow, are you okay, kid?” The voice caught Mingyu off-guard, making his knees shake and almost give in. He couldn’t see where the voice was coming from, making everything seem more terrifying.

“Please, just leave, please…” Mingyu’s voice was empty of power, and the only thing it contained was fear. He almost started shaking again, until the figure finally came into the light.

The boy was tall, though not as tall as Mingyu. He looked tired, with lidded eyes and a blank expression. His clothes were almost all black, except the blue lanyard around his neck. “It’s okay, kid. I’m not gonna hurt you, or anything.” The tired boy approached Mingyu, who was slightly more at ease now. I don’t know this guy, Mingyu reminded himself, don’t trust him. “I know you don’t trust me, but, like, you look like shit.” Mingyu chuckled humorlessly. “Let me help you out of here, I’ll get you a drink. Come on.”

And Mingyu let him help. The boy wrapped his arm around the younger’s waist, while Mingyu draped his arm over the other’s narrow shoulders. Together, they walked down the street until they reached a small green bench, outside of a convenience store.

“My name’s Wonwoo.” He passed Mingyu a bottle of water, which Mingyu happily received. “And your name is…”

“Mingyu. Kim Mingyu.” He cringed at his horrible delivery, and how he seemed so cliche and just… ew.

“You kinda seem familiar..?” Wonwoo furrowed his brow, but then returned to his normal face, or what Mingyu thinks is his normal face. “Anyway, how the fuck did all this happen?” He gestured to the taller boy’s cut-up face and strangely bruised neck.

“I- uh.. I got kicked out by my dad, and then I ended up here. And these two guys- just… yeah.” Speaking to people about anything vaguely important was never something Mingyu was very good at. The only conversations he was used to were things like ‘is your dad really Kim Minhye?’ or ‘do you wanna go out sometime?’.

“Damn, I’m sorry, kid.” Wonwoo laughed a little, even though it really was not funny. “Maybe you need something stronger than water.” He opened his bag and produced an almost full bottle of vodka from his bag, and waves it in front of Mingyu, who apprehensively takes it.

“Do you usually just carry bottles of hard alcohol in your back?” But Mingyu was definitely not complaining. With parents so obsessed with maintaining a good public image, drinking was entirely off limits And going off limits was his favourite thing.

“Only when I’ve had a particularly shitty day.” Wonwoo stared as the taller boy drank far too much alcohol in such a short amount of time. “You might wanna slow down, you know. You barely look legal to drink.”

“I’m 18.”

“Shit, so you’re not legal. Fuck.”

“Why was your day shitty?” Mingyu’s question caught him off-guard. Why was even bothering to ask about his problems? The younger noticed how Wonwoo’s face creased and furrowed. “I mean- you don’t have to tell me, I just-”

“I found my boyfriend cheating on me with this girl.” Wonwoo stared into the distance, hoping Mingyu wouldn’t notice that he actually cared and had emotions. “Which is strange, considering he said he was gay. So that was great. Then, I got fired from my job at the library. So yeah, not a great day.”

“That must suck, sorry.”

“Yeah, I guess so. Anyway, why did your asshole of a dad kick you out?” Wonwoo reached for the bottle, then equaled the amount Mingyu had drunk.

“I just moved here, with my family. We move a lot, for my dad’s work. Anyway, I went to my new school, and this girl recognised me. Apparently, having a famous dad makes you famous too. But she started hitting on me, and I knew my parents would be pissed if they found out. So we made out in the changing room.” Wonwoo almost choked on the vodka from laughter. “Then I didn’t turn up to school for most of the day. And inevitably, my parents found out.”

“Well,” Wonwoo finally stopped laughing, and hands Mingyu the bottle. “At least you had a little fun today. Was she hot?”

“I- uh, not really? She wasn’t a very good kisser, but I guess kissing isn’t that fun anyway, so that might not have been her fault. She was just… okay, I guess. Not my type.” Mingyu felt himself blush slightly. Speaking about this sort of thing with a complete stranger was bound to be slightly embarrassing.

“That’s a shame. Kissing is great. I’m sure you’ll find someone that you enjoy kissing one day.” Wonwoo laughed once again, making Mingyu embarrassed further. “Fuck it, I’m bored and you’re cute, and we’re both almost drunk so let’s play 20 questions.” The older brings his fingers into a gun-shape, and says, “Shoot.”

“Erm- how old are you?”

“I’m 21. Who’s your dad?” Wonwoo’s question was blunt and Mingyu couldn’t help but stutter a little.

“He’s, um. Kim Minhye. The actor.” Wonwoo eyes grew wide in shock, but then he noticed Mingyu’s head look to the floor, almost as if avoiding the truth.

“And apparently an asshole too.” He grabs the bottle and nudges it against Mingyu’s knee, who gladly took it and downed the remainders of the bottle. “That’s kind of a big deal.”

With a dejected nod, Mingyu looks up and notices sympathy in the older’s eyes, and he has to admit that it’s quite nice.

“So, are you in college?” Changing the subject quick, Mingyu thought, nice one.

“I go to Seoul National University, yeah. Literature major.” Wonwoo practically beamed when he mentioned his major, obviously proud and passionate. Just the sight makes Mingyu return the smile. “What do you wanna do when you leave high school?”

“I’m probably gonna go to a drama school and do what my dad did.” Mingyu was so used to the question that he just gave Wonwoo the same answer he gives everyone.

“Hey, kid.” Wonwoo’s tone was serious, but still soft and beautiful to his ears. “I didn’t ask what your family want you to do. I asked what you want to do.”

Mingyu gasped out loud. How could someone he had only just met seem to care and know him more than anyone else he’d ever known? Mingyu hated acting, pretending to be someone else for money. He wanted to inspire people, wanted them to admire him for being talented and passion, not for being beautiful and a good liar. “Teaching. I wanna teach.”

Wonwoo’s normally blank face smiled, with his nose scrunching up and his teeth showing. Mingyu declared that the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. So he stared, for far too long for it be normal. Honestly, though, he didn’t care.

“Mingyu, have you ever kissed a guy before?”

Mingyu blushed redder than he thought he could, with the deep colour bursting through his sun kissed cheeks. “I- uh-erm. No… but isn’t it my turn to-” But before he could finish, Wonwoo interrupted him.

“Do you want to?” Mingyu’s mind and heart was racing. He wanted to say yes, God, he wanted to. But what if someone saw, and his dad found out? Or worse, if the media found out? But with Wonwoo sat in front of him, looking so welcoming, so beautiful, and so familiar, how could he reject him? So, he nodded.

Wonwoo’s lips were just as soft as he expected. They moved softly together and it just felt so perfect. He smelt like sandalwood: deep and rich, but he tasted like sugar and vodka, and Mingyu loved it.

Kissing was suddenly enjoyable, beautiful and pleasurable. If this is what it was supposed to feel like, he never wanted it to end. And luckily, neither did Wonwoo.

The kiss slowly become more heated, and they angled their heads, allowing further access. Mingyu felt a tongue rub against the roof of his mouth, then teeth on his bottom lip, and everything was just so exciting he couldn’t help but moan just a little (or a lot, he didn’t even care).

Wonwoo knew it was careless. The boy was basically drunk, and he was still in high school - not to mention straight. But everything about him just screamed ethereal. The way his dark eyelashes sat against his cheek, and the way he pouted without even realising. And the way his eyes lit up, when he was shown any sort of affection. Wonwoo really couldn’t help himself. But when he heard a moan, no matter how beautiful of a sound it was, he knew he had to stop.

Mingyu sighed as he pulled away, and lay his forehead on Wonwoo’s shoulder. “I- Wh- erm…” He tried to say something, anything, but his own words betrayed him.

“Look, Mingyu, you should go home… Maybe you’re parents will be asleep, it is pretty late..” Wonwoo stood up, leaving Mingyu lying heavy against the bench. “I- I didn’t mean to do anything, let’s just forget about it,” he chuckled, nervously. “Goodbye, Mingyu. Good luck with- with teaching.” And with that, Wonwoo was gone. He tripped a few times while throwing shaking glances back at Mingyu.

What a fucking night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey,, thank you for getting this far and for reading!! 
> 
> so i have a bad habit of never finishing fics (ive only ever finished one: call me da Vinci of something),, but i guess if you want be to actually finish this one, I can try because I have actually planned the ending!! but hey, if u don't like it tell me, but if u do like it, also tell me anyway yeah ily bye


	2. Chapter 2

  
Luckily, when he got home, his parents were asleep. Just like Wonwoo said. Mingyu mentally slapped himself, because he was not supposed to be thinking about him right now. But he really couldn’t help it. He bouldered upstairs, and threw himself onto his bed, and just… breathed. And thought. About Wonwoo.

Mingyu had been with the most beautiful girls. He could definitely appreciated their beauty, but there was something about Wonwoo that seemed so special, as if Mingyu was only one to notice. A secret beauty. The sharp angles of his monolid eyes, and the perfect slope of his cheekbones, and the way his nose crinkled when he laughed too hard. He was undoubtedly the most beautiful person Mingyu had ever seen, or maybe it was just the alcohol speaking.

Not to mention the kiss. Kissing - something he had never enjoyed - was suddenly something he enjoyed, craved even. Just recounting it made him shiver in pleasure. And that terrified him. Wonwoo was a guy, a college student, a guy. If anyone ever found out, his father, his mother, or worse, the media (because for some reason, they just loved reporting everything he ever did), he’d be fucked, to say the least.

But there was something, deep in his mind, that told him not to care, to be happy, instead of living a lie. He imagined himself in the future: not-so-happily married, reading through movie script after movie script, and walking down the red carpet, putting on a front while camera flashes basically blinded him. The thoughts made him shake his head. No, he thought, that’s not what I want. He closed his eyes again, and forced forward the thoughts he’d suppressed for so long. He saw himself standing at the front of a room, looking upon people, students. Then, it changed to an image of himself, but at home this time. He unlocked his door and saw a figure embracing. A man’s figure. The man let go, and Mingyu got a look at his face. Familiar sharp eyes and a perfect nose, and that beautiful smile that he’d missed, regardless of only seeing it for the first time mere hours ago.

Suddenly, he shot up, frustratedly rubbed his face and pushed the thoughts to the far back of his mind, because no, this was too far. They’d only just met, but he was already thinking about a future with him? Nope.

The lay back down, still in his dirtied school uniform, and smothered himself with his covers, forcing himself to sleep - just to stop his thought from wandering just over the line of normalcy.

 

The thing about getting kicked out, was that you weren’t meant to come back. So when Mingyu woke up and heard his parent, he knew that coming back was a huge mistake. He also knew that he definitely could not go to school wearing a uniform with stains and a strong scent of alcohol. After changing into fresh uniform, he braced himself for the only exit he could think of, without being caught - the window. His bedroom was on the first floor, meaning the fall wasn’t fatal. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt, though. When he finally felt his body hit the floor, he stood it immediately and bolted down the street. The adrenaline rushed through his body, and the rush of breaking the rules filled his brain. It felt great, until he felt an unfamiliar empty on his back. Fuck, he thought, my bag. How was he supposed to get anything done today if he didn’t even have a school bag? The adrenaline faded into disappointed as he slowed his pace and dragged his feet as he walked.

The bell rang as soon as he entered the school corridor, and he couldn’t remember where he was meant to be first period for the life of him. Luckily, there was a boy (he remembered him from one of the classes he actually attended the day prior) in his year, still putting his things away in his locker.

“Excuse me!” Mingyu shouted at the boy, who looked up with a bright smile. His overwhelming positivity made Mingyu a little nervous. “I think we’re in the same lesson, could I maybe- erm.. walk with you? I lost my timetable and-”

“Sure,” the boy said, and his smile widened. “I’m Seokmin!” He started walking to his lesson and Mingyu didn’t follow. “Are you coming, or…?”

Mingyu snapped out of it and quickly followed the boy - Seokmin - to their lesson. Seokmin was a really nice guy, as Mingyu got to know him. He aced all of his classes, even math, and was in the school band. Mingyu’s favourite thing about Seokmin, though, was the fact that he never once mentioned his dad, and spoke to him like he knew nothing about him (Mingyu had kind of accepted that the whole school probably knew at least 1 rumour about him; the more he acknowledged it, the faster he accepted it). He asked him questions like, ‘how was your first day’, and it made Mingyu happy that someone actually wanted to be his friend. “Have you met anyone else in our year yet?”

Mingyu shook his head. “Not really, maybe like a couple of girls, but apart from that, no one.” Seokmin frowned a little. “Apart from you, of course.”

“That’s a shame, you seem pretty cool. Tell you what, you can come sit with me and my friends at lunch if you want?” Seokmin closed his book, indicating that the lesson was almost over. “I mean- we’re not the coolest bunch, but I think we’re okay.”

Mingyu smiled for the first time since… last night - shut up, brain, not now. He collected his thoughts and ignored whatever - whoever - his mind wanted him to think of. “That would be, like, really great!”

The cafeteria was pretty full, and Mingyu didn’t know where to go. He didn’t have his next lesson with Seokmin, which meant that he was pretty much alone. He looked around the room, eagerly looking for his new friend until-

“Mingyu! Hey, over here!” He almost got whiplash from turning around so fast, looking for the voice he just heard. Soon enough, he found Seokmin sat at one of the long tables in the middle of the room. He placed his tray down next to Seokmin’s, and smiled at him. “I’ll introduce you to everyone: that’s Seungkwan, Hansol, Minghao and then that’s Chan. They’re all a year below us, except Chan, he’s two years younger.” Suddenly, Mingyu remembers. He’s seen Chan before, in the boy’s changing room. It seemed as if Chan remembered the same thing, blushing and looking away.

“Erm- yeah, hi. I’m Mingyu.” He scratched the back of his head, still nervous.

“Wow, you seem really timid, for saying you had your tongue down Ahreum’s throat yesterday.” Seungkwan clearly had no shame, and no filter. Chan and Mingyu both choked. “And for saying you’re dad is-”

“Seungkwan.” The boy Seokmin had introduced as Minghao interrupted him. “Do you ever just shut the fuck up?” And Seungkwan did shut the fuck up, as Minghao had so nicely put it.

“Thanks. You didn’t have to, though-” Mingyu whispered to Minghao who was sat across from him.

Minghao smiled, looking a lot less scary than he did a few milliseconds ago. “You looked uncomfortable, it’s okay.”

Mingyu found out quite a lot about his new group of friends: Seungkwan was a complete gossip, but still extremely likeable somehow; Hansol was pretty quiet, but Mingyu had also learnt that he had a strange love for pizza and Drake; Seokmin was loud, whether he was talking or singing (which he was far too good at); Chan seemed to be babied by his hyungs, but there was this small smile on his face that showed that really, he loved them. He learnt the most about Minghao, though. He learnt that he was born in China, which explained the accent and frequent mistakes; he also learnt that he was a b-boy, and was invited to one of his performances.

Minghao’s phone buzzed and the screen lit up, displaying a text from ‘Junhui’. The boy chuckled and slid the notification left to clear it. The now empty screen now display his background: a boy (he was pretty sure it was Minghao himself) being kissed on the cheek by another boy, who was slightly taller, with slightly darker skin.

“Who’s that?” Mingyu didn’t mean to let his question slip, and he honestly regretted it - he wasn’t supposed to be staring at Minghao’s phone, it’s not something people do.

“On my phone?” Mingyu nodded. “It’s me and Junhui.”

Mingyu was already in too deep with curiosity so he had to ask. “Is he your boyfriend?” It came off blunt, almost piercingly. “I- uh.. I mean-”

“Yeah, he is.” Minghao now furrowed his eyebrows and gave Mingyu a look he didn’t expect to receive. “You’re okay with that, though… right?”

Mingyu’s eyes widened in shock. That was not what he meant, and he hated that that was how he came across. “No! Wait, what- I’m fine with it. I really didn’t mean it in that way!” Minghao laughed, noticing how sincere Mingyu was being, so he let it slide. But Mingyu was still a little curious. “Does he go to this school?”

“No, he’s a little older. He studies literature at Seoul National University.” Mingyu’s eyes widened even more, with his mind flooding with Wonwoo, Wonwoo, Wonwoo. Maybe, Junhui knew him, maybe they were friends. He could get Junhui to tell him how he felt. But how did he feel? He really-

“Shit, Mingyu, are you okay? You basically just blacked out for like 2 minutes!” But Mingyu still didn’t know what to say, and all he wanted to do was run. So he did.

He wanted the feeling to be gone. He wasn’t gay, he couldn’t be, one-hundred-percent out of the question. But somewhere, he knew it was a legitimate possibility. He needed to sort his shit out, and fast.

In the corner of his eye, he saw a girl eyeing him up, something he wasn’t unfamiliar with. Maybe, if he kissed her, he’d feel something, just like he did yesterday. I have to at least try. He approached her and grabbed her by the hand. Being frantic always made him balder than he wished he was, and almost always led to something he’d regret, but right now, he couldn’t stop. They walked until they reached an empty classroom, and when they entered, he kissed her.

He felt absolutely nothing, and he hated it. He detached their lips and sat down on the desk behind him. She - he didn’t know her name - looked confused. “Mingyu, right? Are you okay? You look… kinda faint.”

“What does kissing feel like? Did you feel anything - just like?” He needed to know, he couldn’t be the only one.  
  
“I- uh… Yes, I guess so. Like, tingling, you know…” She blushed a dark red. “Why..? Did you- did you feel anything?”

“Nothing, at all.” He pushed his hair back in frustration. “Is there something wrong with me? There must be, right?”

She walked towards him, clearly noticing his discomfort, and sat next to him. “No, there’s nothing wrong with you, maybe you just- don’t… like girls…” Mingyu physically flinched. “You’re fine, Mingyu. It’s normal, you didn’t choose it.” She rubbed circles in his back for reassurance. “I’ll get someone who can help, just- stay here.” Mingyu was about to protest but he knew he couldn’t.

“Wh-who are you? And why are being so nice to me?”

She smiled widely. “My name’s Kim Minkyung, and I guess it’s because you deserve to be treated well, you seem like a nice guy!”

And with that, she left. And now Mingyu was alone.

Until Minghao opened the door and was immediately by his side.

“Are you sure you’re doing fine, man? Minkyung seemed pretty worried when she got me…” Minghao looked concerned, and it made Mingyu feel bad - he didn’t want to worry anyone.

But he did want to know what was going on in his own head and maybe, just maybe, Minghao could help. “How did you know…?”

“How did I know what?” But then his confused face morphed into something different: understanding. “How did I know that I was gay?” Mingyu apprehensively nodded. “I guess I just never liked girls. When I kissed them, I just kinda felt… nothing. And when I kissed a guy for the first time, it just felt like… what it was supposed to feel like, you know?” Minghao’s answer was everything Mingyu wanted, but the opposite of what he needed. He needed to disagree with everything his friend had said, but he didn’t… “Mingyu, why? Are you, maybe…?”

“I can’t be. What if my dad found out? It’d ruin his career, if the news found out. I’d make him a laughing stock. I’d-”

“No matter how much the world loves your father, he sounds like an asshole,” Minghao chuckled. “Don’t think that you’re any less of a person just because this stupid country doesn’t agree. You don’t have to tell anyone about it, you know. Being in the closet is okay, just look at Seungkwan and Hansol.”

Mingyu’s eyes widened and he gasped. “They’re… gay?”

Minghao laughed. “They’ve been dating for, what, 2 years now. No one knows, outside of our friend group.” Mingyu smiled, finally feeling as if he had his own people now, his own friends. “Now, come on, let’s get our gay asses out of this classroom, before the bell rings.” Minghao pulled him up into a hug, before they left

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i wrote this chapter ages ago,,, i just really don't feel inspired at all but i thought I'd post it anyway and see if I get inspired by anything a t a l l,, but hey! I updated!! (probably little enthusiasm tbh yeah okay bye)


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